Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: February 27, 2012
The experiment, thus far, has been a success as measured by my own perceptions and those of my family. Awareness really does help! When I’m tempted to yell, if it is, indeed, out of frustration, instead of yelling mindlessly at the kids, I yell “FRUSTRATED!” and they understand that I’m feeling thwarted. That takes the fire out of the moment and I’m able to articulate WHY I’m feeling that way. It also makes them vibrantly aware of what it is that they’re not doing. By depersonalizing the moment, even though it is personal because they’re not listening, it makes the volume of my voice less threatening to the kids. Maybe it’s the difference between yelling BECAUSE of the children as opposed to yelling AT them. In addition, by admitting that I’m feeling frustrated, a feeling they WELL understand and which they often express in tears, I’m once again showing them that mom is, indeed, human and a person like them.
And the number of tick marks due to matters not related to frustration? None. They’re awesome children, the lights of my life. They don’t need to be yelled at.
But thank goodness I put that caveat in about yelling at other things/people!!!! I’ve been really mad at one of the boy’s teachers who is so mindless that she allowed his group to play sexually-explicit songs during a gym routine (and now that I’ve objected to the principal and the teachers has had to withdraw the song, his group is mad at my son). And then there’s the multitude of people who don’t know how to drive. So my vocal chords get a daily workout even when the kids aren’t around.
Thanks to those of you who read this. I do appreciate it.
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: January 19, 2012
Well, my vision had been to lose an even 70 pounds, but that was stopped at my yearly physical when my doctor, who is a balanced guy (not an alarmist) told me to stop losing weight. He said that even though my BMI is shows me as being overweight, the BMI does not take into account body mass. Thus, you can be a perfectly healthy weight with a slightly high BMI. He wanted to see me again in 3 months to make sure I don’t lose any more weight.
Not a problem, Doc, nor something I need a doctor’s visit for.
Since that time, I’ve gone off the diet and realized something: it’s still hard not to sink into previous patterns. I fluctuate within a 4-pound range (usually inching above) my new goal weight. And if I go beyond that range, as I did the other day, I do a milk day to reign myself in.
I’m also working out at least 30 minutes four times a week, not for the weight aspect, but the mental health aspect of my health. Serotonin is a wonderful thing and I’ve got to get my levels up.
Carbs are still the enemy, so I try to limit them, and water is still my hero, so I drink lots of it.
People say I look 30 years younger and all the feedback is keeping me going. The most surprising aspect of this whole process is that I actually have to get new eyeglasses because my face has gotten so much thinner!
Accu-Beads recommends a slow transition period. I kinda came off like gangbusters, but even on a week’s vacation, managed to stay within my new range. There’s a mindfulness to my eating now. It’s not guilt and it’s refreshing to eat a few M&Ms without my husband giving me the hairy eyeball like “should you REALLY be eating that?” – the answer is usually yes, but I can NOW stop after eating just a few. I’m not reaching for junk just because it’s there.
I’m also aware that this is a struggle I’ll live with for the rest of my life. Every day we have choices. That’s just life.
Oh, and the bitchiness? Not there as much. Granted, the surge of energy everyone claims they have once they lose weight isn’t there. I still get tired at night, probably because menopause has kicked in (another reason I want to up my serotonin), and I still yell. But the bitch truck doesn’t come to my house as often.
I’m in a size Medium now. Not the Small I was years ago when I originally lost a ton of weight. But I’m not the same age I was 20 years ago. I’ve had kids. The body changes. But at least I’m healthy.
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: November 27, 2011
Day 67 and I am 46 pounds lighter. That’s more than the weight of my 6-year old daughter. 24 pounds until goal!
I survived Thanksgiving by putting my foot down. After hosting EVERY holiday since my brother got divorced 6 years ago, I realized that I just could NOT serve Thanksgiving dinner. Even after my husband offered to cook, I just didn’t have it in me, especially since it was just going to be our immediate family plus my mom and my mother-in-law.
Now, these are two women who EXPECT to be served, especially my MIL who thinks her age automatically entitles her to being treated like a queen. My mom, at least, will help out a bit, but not the other one.
Anyway, in my present diet condition I could not serve a full meal to people who rarely say “please” and “thank you.” So my husband found a restaurant that served dinner. My daughter had her noodles with butter, my son had a steak, my mother chose eggplant, while my husband had his turkey dinner; someone else (who emphatically declared that she HAD to have her turkey – as if it was a Constitutional mandate) stuffed her face with unlimited turkey.
I had a plain salad which the chef (God Bless Him!) made so beautifully that I didn’t feel deprived at all. A little lemon juice and salt on it and I was in heaven!
This week is my birthday (fruit salad with a candle, please) and when my husband takes me out later in the week, I may splurge a teeny bit and have an extra veggie or two on my salad.
I’m hoping that by Christmas I’ll be at goal. It’s not impossible.
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: November 17, 2011
Disney On Ice: Dare To Dream opened tonight at the Prudential Center. Thanks to complimentary tickets, I got a chance to take the kids. Would I have gone if the tickets hadn’t been free? No, and as it was, it cost the three of us $40 just in parking ($20) and snacks. And that was with a lot of “no” saying on my part.
The quest to get our money began as soon as we left Gateway Parking with a vendor right outside hawking princess items. Clearly, the Disney Marketing Machine and anyone else who could possibly make money off us was out and trying. Once you resolve yourself to denying your begging children the various tiaras, dolls, token swords, and various light up items for sale, not to mention the vastly over-priced food (Ok, I caved on the popcorn), the show itself is really good.
Since it’s Disney, you know it’s going to be slick and professional. And since princesses are involved, you know it’s going to be full of the “happily ever after” myth. As my 11-year old son said as he looked out over the audience, “Mom! It’s a sea of pink.”
The show itself is fun. The actors are well-trained to stay in character and they made plenty of eye contact with their pint-sized fans. There were plenty of bells and whistles including fluorescent effects, torches, fireworks, some neat pieces involving a pulley and scarves. Nothing was too scary for my friend’s 2-year old, although the sound system was a bit much for his little ears. The skaters make every maneuver look effortless and easy, which considering their Olympic-caliper moves, can’t be the case.
The “plot” tells three stories with the first the story of The Princess and The Frog. The three of us got the gist of the story even though we hadn’t seen the movie and the voodoo scenes weren’t the least bit frightening.
The second story is that of Cinderella. The skater who plays her was probably the most athletic in the show and is clearly the most accomplished athlete in the company. One mistake the producers made was in having the actress who had just played Tiana come out first in the Prince’s Ball scene. She’s a lovely lady but her presence foremost in the lineup caused some confusion when my daughter couldn’t’ understand why Tiana was at The Ball. A plus was when the royal guards and prince had audience members try on the glass slipper as the prince searches for Cinderella. And kudos to whomever designed the scene where Cinderella rides in her carriage; the skaters who played the horses were regal and the costumes a beautifully done.
The third story is that of Rapunzel in the movie Tangled. . I love this story because unlike the other two wenches who marry into royalty, this princess is at least born into the role. And the two skaters who play Rapunzel and Flynn Rider are amazing together. The scene where they use pulleys and scarves to become airborne is not only creative, but shows that these two are accomplished acrobats as well. Now about Maximus, the horse, while the costume is well done, the horse has only one expression. Surely, whoever came up with such a marvelous costume could have designed eyes that looked more than just annoyed. And the scene where Rapunzel’s mom stabs Flynn was a bit overwhelming for some kids; it’s one thing to see violence in cartoon form. It’s quite another to see it in person. Several children gasped when it happened. But again, all in all, I really enjoyed watching the actors who portrayed Rapunzel and Rider. Their death spiral move was breathtaking and if you enjoy Pairs figure skating, these two are fun to watch.
The finale in which there’s a procession of princesses ready to welcome Rapunzel into the fold is creatively done and I was happy to see my favorite, Mulan, included in the parade. The royal couples were greeted by the audience as if they were old friends and I guess, to the kids, they are. Again, you’re dealing with the well-oiled Disney machine, so there’s plenty of waving and smiling on the part of the company. I’m sure no little ones left disappointed with what they saw.
As for me, I liked it, too. The boy had sucked it up for his little sister, using the term “chick flick” appropriately and my daughter fell asleep with a smile on her face. That’s all the evidence I need to encourage you to check out Disney On Ice.
To learn more about Disney On Ice: Dare To Dream, go to http://disney.go.com/disneyonice.
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: November 14, 2011
Still on the Bead Diet and tonight is brutal! I’m ravenous but not caving in. My 20 ounces of milk were finished 3 hours ago and I’ve employed my usual arsenal of hunger-fighting ammo:
- sugar free Jello (just couldn’t stomach it today)
- sugar-free candies
- flavored waters
- tea
I even licked some Braggs Amino Acid soy sauce (legal) off my palms. Nothing is working.
I would love to cheat for just one second, but I’m afraid if I do, I’ll blow up like a balloon or it will lead to more cheating.
Not giving in, but not happy either.
___
By the way, if you’d like discount tickets to see Disney On Ice, copy this link into your browser: http://bit.ly/snHJeK.
The tickets are only $10.31 and I’ll be reviewing the show in a few days.
Now, excuse me while I gnaw my foot off.
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: November 8, 2011
So its been exactly 49 days (or 7 weeks) since I began this diet. I’m down 36 pounds. Really – 36 pounds. I am 10 pounds lighter than I was when I got pregnant with my son. I’m not snoring nearly as loudly as I once did. My legs don’t throb at night. And I can tie my daughter’s shoes without getting out of breath. People are starting to notice.
And it’s still as hard to follow as it was on Day 1. We lost power for 5 days and the family was severely stressed…but I stayed on the diet. Even through Halloween, during which I would have killed my kids for a Snickers bar, I stayed on the diet. I have no idea how.
But now that I’m half way to my goal, I’m not giving up now. My goal, by the way, is not an unreasonable number but one based on a healthy BMI. I’ll actually be 5 pounds above my healthy BMI, but I’m thinking I should be able to lose those final 5 without the beads.
I’m still as cranky as before, but now that I’m aware of it, taking action is a little easier. If I know I’m going to blow my top over something small, I’m more likely to take a step away and breathe before I holler. Not always – but sometimes.
I had hoped to be off of Accu Beads before Thanksgiving. Not gonna happen. I’m shooting for the end of the year.
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: October 27, 2011
Still on the bead diet. Am down 28 pounds with no sign of stopping. Lots of complaining, yes, but no stopping. My immediate family has been VERY supportive with my husband getting 28 pounds of his free weights & handing them to me so I can very concretely see how much poundage I’m down. My brother, as well, is amazed.
Then there’s the 83 year old family member who has been on Weight Watchers most of her life. She eventually lost a bunch of weight due to illness. Anyway, when I was last over there, she listened as I explained the diet, then said, “Oh, you’re going to put it right back on.” Then she yelled at me because we couldn’t go out to dinner that night since it was a milk day; she apparently was ignoring the $60 worth of food that I’d shopped for and brought over – to watch EVERYONE ELSE eat.
My husband says I need to be tolerant of her. NO I DON’T! Mean is mean!
I won’t be going over there for a while…and I will NOT be putting the weight back on. I’ve come too far to backslide.
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: October 19, 2011
My fellow dieters have all kinds of recipes for complying with this torture, I mean, diet.
Here’s what I’ve learned thus far:
1. When people tell you that grilled cauliflower tastes just like popcorn, it doesn’t.
2. Broiled butternut squash is really good, but it’s weird to spend 2 days looking forward to it.
3. Milk actually does make a soup (I prefer to call it chowder) when you add xanthan gum.
4. If you put too much xanthan gum in your milkshake, you wind up chewing it.
5. Kale is flammable. And it’s bullshit that grilled kale tastes like potato chips. It tastes like crispy kale.
6. Broiled brussel sprouts, however, are yummolicious.
Oh, and Happy 6th Birthday to my sweet, little daughter (who keeps eating all of my diet food!!!).
Posted by: L. Klonsky/aka Mom's Crayon on: October 18, 2011
It feels like I’ve been on this diet longer than 28 days. Yet, as hard as it is, as excruciating as I’m finding it, I can’t argue with the results. 24 pounds in 28 days is AMAZING.
People are finally starting to notice and that’s really nice. Sure, my clothes are a little looser. But I’m still waiting for all this energy people have been assuring me I’d get.
And, again, IT’S HARD!!!!! I know I’m whining, but the challenge of it hits me every day. It’s virtually impossible to go out, except if you’re on a veggie day. Then you can have a very bland salad, which inevitably is not worth the money, topped by lemon juice and salt as a dressing. Honestly, it’s not bad. When someone wants to meet me on a milk day, I just switch it to meeting for coffee and then I don’t feel like such a pariah. But when you’ve got kids and have to be around pizza and fries a lot, it can be murder. Take my daughter’s birthday party yesterday: I ate NOTHING there. No popcorn, no veggies, no pizza, and no lovely pink Barbie cake.
And the bitchiness continues. It tends to hit about 7pm and doesn’t stop until I go to bed. My poor children know it’s the diet, but I can’t help but see the toll it’s taking on the family.
I’m hoping to be off this thing by Thanksgiving. Not because I love turkey, but just so I can feel a little more normal.
